mom's weekend

My mom was in tucson this past weekend and I simply cannot deny that it was ENTIRELY needed and appreciated. With the shopping, cooking, eating, drinking, unconditional loving, my little heart was filled to the brim and was spilling all over the place! It's hard to slow down and realize that sometimes it's necessary to have one of those weekends where you don't check your email until sunday evening and when your phone rings..meh who cares? if it really matters they will leave a message or text you or email you or something! Having one of those weekends semi- refueled me for the next couple of weeks until spring break. I mean, no big deal, these weeks are 'effing INSANE, but as part of this new positivity slash less complaining kick that I'm running with, I think I can handle it!

A big issue that has suddenly errupted into my quiet (well metaphorically not literally) life is this new sudden interest in like 10 guys. Actually, lets be real here. It's more like 4, but for someone who started off the semester with ZERO, it's quite a step-up. Now I'm not going to go into the gory details because how am I supposed to know who reads this? But I will say that I am standing FIRMLY by my original thought on relationships in college. I still think they are unrealistic, they are not useful in growing as in individual and often, girls find that the guy of their dreams that they met that one drunken night at that drunken frat house, turns out to be just like the rest of them, the opposite of what she thought her prince charming was supposed to be.

So if I can't realistically find my prince charming until I'm introducing 25 into my life, why settle? I am totally unopposed to having fun. Now, let me clarify, I am so not advocating sleeping around, but why do we have to make these things so serious by slapping a label on everything? It is just so complicated and messy and YUCK. no thanks. I am far too busy to be some suzy-homemaker girlfriend who focuses on her boyfriend more than herself. and besides, as a 20 year old WOMAN, why would I want a BOYfriend? a MANfriend will do just fine thank you very much!

perhaps I'm jaded. whatever. I just think when you are writing stupid poetry to your boyfriend and stuck(in my eyes) in a relationship that is destined towards marriage without even testing the waters of whoever else is out there, you are an idiot.

But who am I to say what decisions people make? I am not anyone except me, myself and I. I totally believe in love and everything it stands for, just not in my age category (18-24). Love starts when you make personal sacrifices off of daddy's credit card, but again that's just me talking. :]

ANYwho, I will say sianora to the blogging world as I greet my beautifully made bed (thank you mom :] ) with open arms!

xoxo

tuesday

tuesday is such a busy day. i feel like my head is always going to fall off with the added weight that this day brings.

i'm so tired, i don't even want to write!

okay i've convinced myself. good night world!

movie trailers and messy rooms

so tonight was an academic bust. yeah i know i went on a freakout earlier today about how i need to be on my "A Game" and whatever but I just couldn't do it. I mean I have all of my homework done...it just took longer than it should have.

i need to prioritize and do homework before watching 90210 and random movie trailers on apple. but omg its so hard.

that's all, i'm off to read about feminism. PEACE

i'm officially stressed.

So I am the type of person that bites off WAY more than I can chew. I when I can't chew and swallow, I feel like I've failed. And not only have a failed myself, but everyone around me, even the people who obviously don't care. I would love to know why I feel that way, I try to take it as a blessing in disguise that I actually care.

I am trying to stay up on my game this semester but as I am trying so hard, it's still so easy to spill into habits of the past or find myself more worn out every moment. Do I put this upon myself? Do I put my expectations among the planets when they really should be level with my nose and eyes and ears? Yes is the solution to both answers but once a habit sets in, breaking it requires a sledgehammer. I don't have time to find a sledgehammer this semester so I guess my mini heart attacks will have to continue.

THAT'S ALL TODAY because I honestly don't have anymore time to write anything else!